I started writing “Doctor Sun’s column “18 years ago, that was 2003, under the first MD Chief Mike Awoyinfa. A regular feed back question from most of my male respondents has always been on impotence. I have written about impotence ad nauseam. Yet the questions keep popping in regularly. “Doc I am ashamed to ask this question, I cannot meet my wife anymore, life has lost its meaning”. Doc, I have a problem, my thing is very weak when it rises and falls easily”. Doc, I have not met my wife in the past 6 months, because my organ cannot get up no matter how long my wife plays with it “. Doc, I used to go 3 rounds in a day, but now I can hardly do one”.
I could write a book on numerous sexual questions and problems, I have received in the past 18 years. The most striking thing is that women hardly ask sexual questions, apart from occasional complaints about dry organs, and inability to enjoy sex due to certain encumbrances. So today, I shall look at impotence from a different perspective. As, I have defined severally, impotence (erectile dysfunction), is the inability to initiate and maintain an erection in at least 50% of the attempts at intercourse, or the cessation of attempts at intercourse.
Erection has been recorded in all ages – from baby boys a few minutes after birth, to old men in their late 90s. But the ability, usually develops with puberty, and may be lost as old age approaches. Erection can occur gradually, or in as fast as 3 seconds, and can also be lost rapidly or slowly. The length of time for which erection can be maintained varies considerably, and depends on circumstances, but tends to decline with age.
Being impotent can mean two things
Being unable to get erection, or
Being unable to reach orgasm, even if there is an erection.
Note this scientific fact, over 90% of impotence is psychological. So men – “give me a break”, as President Biden said the other day when asked by a reporter whether he could not deliver more than 100 million vaccines in 100 days. So men stop killing yourselves when you can’t get it up, because the major cause is temporary. Just do a little introspection, because what is disturbing you is psychological.
The few physical causes of long-term impotence can be categorized into : physical development and changes in the adult body state. We should note that an occasional incident of impotence is quite normal. It should only be thought of as a problem if is a regular occurrence. But 9 cases in 10 as I stated earlier are psychological – as is often shown by an ability to have erection (and orgasm) from self masturbation or during sleep, but not in sexual relationship.
Such impotence, typically involves men, who have experienced intercourse to orgasm as the norm at a past stage in their lives, and who may eventually return to this. However, in a few cases of deep psychological disturbance, a man may never have had an erection in any circumstance.
The psychological causes of impotence can arise from various levels of motivations. Conscious or nearly conscious causes can be :
Fear of the consequences of intercourse, pregnancy, venereal disease or HIV.
Feelings of resentment, disgust or dislike toward the partner, and especially,
Fear of sexual failure – the feeling that one is on trial. For example, fear that one will fail to “perform impressively “, or fail to please the partner, especially fear of premature ejacultion, and of impotence itself. Such fear may be set off by a single incident or particular situation, or by the impact of one’s own or one’s partner’s sexual difficulties.
More deep rooted causes are usually due to early experience, including especially the relationship with one’s parents, or traumatic experiences when first attempting intercourse.
They can result in a distaste for sexual activity.
Feelings of resentment toward women in general.
Inability to reconcile sexuality with an idealistic image of women.
Fear of unacceptable “incest fantasies”, through failure to progress beyond a child hood “Oedipus Complex” – a desire to kill one’s father and have intercourse with one’s mother.
Fear of the vagina as a castration instrument that is, belief that vagina could cut off or chop off one’s penis.
General neurotic personally disorders.
Next week we shall discuss impotence as it relates alcohol, drug abuse, certain lifestyle, existing medical conditions and management.
Always be medically guided.
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