In a WhatsApp message I received, a man went to a company and the manager introduced a lady to him as their new staff member, not knowing that they knew themselves. Possessing the right for making decisions there, which was not disclosed to the lady, he told the manager behind her, to promote her and make her their Human Resources Officer. He told him also, to give her an official car, a bungalow for her official residence, as well as a gardener, and security details. 

A month later, he went there with an application letter, in pretence of looking for a job. The Human Resources Officer threw his application at his face, tore it, and threw the pieces into the trash can. Muttering certain things about their past relationship, she swore that it would be over her dead body for him to be employed in that company. He left and came back the next day with another application, pleading with her on his knees. She ignored him and spat into the trash can, saying that if he was the only bridge she must cross to come to work, she would opt for a boat. She sent for their security guards to come and throw him out of her office. As if it was that Good Friday, Satan thought he had won, Uncle left. Aunty might have rejoiced for her deadly blow to her enemy. 

A few days after, as if it was that Easter morning the Lord Jesus rose from the dark grave, Uncle, in his true identity, and accompanied by the manager, entered Madam’s office. The manager, lifting up the veil, introduced him as the Chief Executive Officer. Was William Shakespeare there, he would have described the scene as an ‘improbable fiction’, but it was real. Aunty could not understand how he could be the owner of the company! The two times they met, the manager did not disclose that identity to her, for it was to be kept secret to everyone, except to the manager and the company secretary. She bowed immediately before him, begging for forgiveness and reconciliation, even of their marriage issue.    

There was something, however, Aunty knew deeply about the Chief Executive Officer, though she did not know him by that position, which the manager did not know. There was something also about her, the Chief Executive Officer knew deeply, but unknown to the manager. That was, that the two people with him, were once, husband and wife! What, Aunty, his former wife! How could she be? Why did he allow her to work in his company and in a position she did not merit? How did he make her comfortable with all these amenities?

The woman’s ugly reactions to him represent the deeds of those that deny opportunities to people they have issues with, irrespective of their qualification for the job. They forget that their company is in business to make money, which is translated by the profit they make. The quality of their personnel contributes largely to it. To deny employment to someone, who is qualified, based on your misunderstanding with him, is working against the interest of your company. It can attract termination of employment. In 1964, I bought something from a man I knew that he and my elder sister were having issues. She was angry with me for patronizing the business of her enemy. I told her that by buying something from the man, he did not show me any favour, and I did not show him either.  I stressed before her that what we did was absolutely business transaction, where I exchanged my money with what I needed, which he had. Akirika!   

Tearing the application for employment of her enemy before him and telling him that he would never be employed in that company, was a demonstration of excessive anger. It spoke loudly of her bad character. We are not told what caused their divorce, but one can infer from her conduct that she might have contributed much to it. Imagine her former spouse, bowing down, and pleading with her for forgiveness! He was doing what perhaps, many husbands, had never done before, yet she was not moved! Thinking that she would punish him because he might have needed the job badly, and asserting that if the bulk must pass through his table, she would opt for a boat, exposed her deep arrogance.

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It was incredible that she went on her knees to beg him, when the curtain was lifted up, pleading, not only to retain her job, being the breadwinner of her family, but even for reconciliation of their broken marriage. It means nothing. May we not allow anger to control us. It is like a student reading his books seriously when the examination result has been released. That was what Aunty did. When the rapture has taken place, it will be the fate of people, who refused to give their lives to the Lord Jesus. “I never knew you: depart from Me, ye that work iniquity,” the Lord Jesus will tell them. Today is the acceptable time to turn to the Lord.      

We have much to learn from Uncle, a man, who would promote a woman that has divorced him to a position in his company, which she did not merit. He also provided her with benefits she never imagined. This is what true forgiveness is all about. It is absolute, forgiving and forgetting. Many men would have told their manager to sack her that day he saw her. He did not. He went rather the extra mile in making her comfortable. That was what David did on the two occasions King Saul came with his soldiers to kill the young champion.       

The Lord Jesus went everywhere ministering God’s Word and healing the sick. Judas, one of His disciples, betrayed Him. The Lord Jesus was arrested, accused falsely and crucified by the Jewish leaders. On the cross, He prayed for their forgiveness. It is possible to forgive someone when lives are not involved. In this case, His life was involved, yet He forgave them. Stephen followed the same pattern, praying for the forgiveness of his murderers. These are examples left for us to copy, whether the person apologies to us or not. 

Concerning Aunty’s plea for reconciliation of their marriage issue, there is nothing wrong with it. It will depend, however, on what they did or did not do after their divorce. Are they children of God, who may divorce but remain single as long as the spouse is alive? If the two of them have remarried, they may not break off from their spouses and remarry. If he has remarried and she has not, she could return because of her children but they must never share the bed. 

This is why we must live in peace with our spouse, and not divorce what God has joined together. To do this, tolerance must be an unavoidable commodity in our home, all the time, and with it, forgiveness, the twin brother.

For further comment, please contact: Osondu Anyalechi: 0802 3002-471; [email protected]