Ken and Peace had been friendly since they started their Master’s degree programme in one of the universities in Lagos State. They were not even dating, but fellow students knew them as close pals. Then for the fact that they were not in their undergraduate class anymore, many felt they were adults who knew their onions.

Now, it was one of those highly tense examinations in one of their dreaded courses in statistics. The exam sent cold shivers into the spines of the student. This very course could qualify some as MBA graduates, while other might join the leagues of the many carry-over students. As the results were released, many came to school to check through, and discovered it was a dream come through for the first time in the history of the department. Almost all made it, except a very few unserious students. Hey, it was merry all day. It means graduation is sure because almost the whole class landed softly on a sofa floor according to Kiss Daniel, who sang the popular Buga song. There were smiles because fearful students have conquered the course. It therefore called for instant celebration. Big boys and girls in the class made smart moves within the neighborhood and before one could say jack; the ball was set rolling. Dispatch riders arrived in droves following each other with enough food and drinks. Tables were set and different bottles, especially the greens took their positions on the table. Before the music man arrived, some used their phones to warm up the place amidst careless jokes and laughter. This was the mood of the unplanned celebration as it started earnestly while the night was drawing near. Still within the venue, some ladies felt comfortable to share rooms with their classmates. All knew that Ken and Peace definitely would share because they are friends. With time, they started retiring to various rooms as if it was normal. Some were even tipsy and felt like crashing out to cool off.

Surprisingly, for Peace and Ken, as she laid in her full outfit to relax, because it was just few hours of crashing; she felt a closer move around her by her friend Ken. She shifted further towards the wall. The move came closer and stronger. She mounted a stiff resistance and hid under the duvet. She thought it was a joke until Ken rolled over her. Peace felt the hot strong third leg on full course looking for a consoling spot. That was when Peace realized Ken was not joking. Of a true he needs a penile insertion and some cuddling from the opposite sex on the same bed with him. It was so obvious that he has become a wild dog of a sort, crying and looking for quench his thirst. He was hot and needed an oil-rig exploration as fast as possible. Peace’s voice was a bit loud, and said “This is not the right time to have sex. I thought we are friends and not lovers. To ken, he was talking to herself while still rolling over her; using his third led to send all necessary signals. Ken said “You should have known by now that I have been admiring you secretly. I didn’t need to struggle over this. Why are you proving stubborn and difficult.” Peace struggled with every strength in her to push Ken away. Her saving grace was the pair of tight jeans she wore all day. It was a war zone. He was very busy allover Peace who was still mounting serious resistance. “She murmured amidst panting; we cannot just dabble into sex without knowing our health status. What if any of us is infected unknowingly? When last did you check your status.” Ken was still raging like a hungry lion; he needed a quick sex badly. Part of that arousal was the effect of the alcohol consumed at the unplanned party. But Peace was not ready for any casual sex. She was not one of those ‘runs’ girls who can get on and have a fling carelessly and move on. The struggle continued and Peace became helpless and broke down in tears. Ken was not relenting at all; all that mattered to him was where his manhood would enter to complete the cycle for the day. She finally used her last strength and pushed him away even as his own tempo had managed to subside.  Both became helpless until early hours of the morning.

In Peace’s physical weakness after an all-night fight with her good friend Ken. She summoned courage and said the following. “This is morning Ken. The day has broken and light that covers all bad characters has come.”

Ken had realized himself and was a bit ashamed of his action the previous night. In that weary state, Peace continued: “Ken is this the stuff you are made of? Now I know that the night exposes the true nature of a man. You were beastly and almost raped me. You rough handled me and never thought about my feelings. Why? This is the first time I came close to a man who I am not dating even though my virginity status is my business and nobody else’s. It has also taught me that the dark hours, closed doors and nights expose the true nature of a man who is supposed to be a true friend. The daytime hides a lot just like clothes cover various personal challenges.”

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She went on and grumbled and lamented before she left Ken in his poor regrettable state. Ken who had realized himself became pathetic and his senses returned immediately. How would this lady see me after today? Could this situation be remedied? How would my bosom friend see me after that incident? Will she ever be my friend again? Stories for another day.

The question now is when is the right time to have sex in a relationship? Well, this depends on what both the man and the lady want ab initio. From the first date, both might begin to sense what they want because an adage says first impression matters. Some hit the ground running from the first day and enjoy themselves without caring whose ox is gored. It could happen at a night club when two hot heads climax and needed to ease tension, they could just have an unavoidable quick sex. Then afterwards, all would go their separate ways and even forget what happened.

Interestingly, in a decent relationship where there is maturity and respect, it is not easy for a lady to be caught pants down just like that. It takes a gradual process. While the man is studying and trying to convince himself if she is the bone of his bone; the lady wants to be assured that the sin should be committed with the altar at sight. As she is getting close to the altar, she is also willing to have sex with her man because she is sure of herself and her man.

For starters, there might be no right time, but know it that sex is not a child’s play. It is a serious matter. Players are usually careful but men in their nature grab sex from nearly all corners. Men see it as a natural call to duty and therefore have no timetable. But some great school of thought will tell you it is no food because one act of sexual enjoyment can destroy a man or a woman for the entire life. What if in the process of quick rush, the lady welcomes an unwanted pregnancy? Which leads to other problems between the two families? What if she is infected with sexually transmitted diseases?

On the other hand, some people might think that an early rush into sex with a strange partner might reduce the lady to a cheap bowl before the man. There are some other forms of relationship where a man and woman would always have sex whenever they come in contact. Reason why most husbands prevent their wives from most school re-unions because a casual sex could just occur and everyone keeps straight face.

There is actually time for sex to take its place in the life of a man and a woman. That little period of study is a window that allows both the man and the woman to know what is good for them. Some men have also come deceptively to have sex and ended up in a marriage they did not plan for. Sex is not a child’s play especially for the woman. At the end of the day, both planned and unplanned sex would always backfire on the woman. For women, there is a time to have sex in a relationship, except you are married to him. Be very careful in having sex at all times.   

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