The people to avoid, include those who disrespect the talents of other people, including yours; and those who provide toxic relationship. 

There’s a wide range of health impacts for those in a toxic or unhealthy relationships. The following are from various researchers:

•Being in a constant state of alarm, unable to relax or “let down,” as well as interrupted sleep, anxiety and depression can influence health negatively and can weaken the immune system over time. Those who experience extreme emotional stress due to toxic relationships may also be unable to focus on work, parenting, school and other responsibilities. This in itself contributes to an increase in physical stress.

Such relationships can lead stress to manifest from the outside to the inside.

•People who are having trouble with stress can hurt themselves with food, alcohol, nicotine, caffeine or prescription or illegal drugs.

The ups and downs of toxic relationships result in adrenal fatigue. When the brain perceives danger, it floods the system with adrenaline and other drugs.

•Women with high levels of disagreements and conflict in their marriages are found to have higher blood sugar levels and blood pressure, higher rates of obesity and lower levels of good cholesterol. Among both sexes, those with greater martial concerns have been found to have more instances of diabetes, depression, heart attack and stroke.

•Those who are in stressful or bad relationships often have trouble sleeping. And those who don’t sleep deeply don’t feel as positive, and because the immune system rebuilds itself during sleep, the system can become compromised with lack of sleep, making a person more vulnerable to disease.


It has been proven that the longer one remains in a toxic relationship, the greater the damage to health, but in relationships like marriage, you don’t just take a walk.

So what do we do? General advice is that we try to make the relationship work.

Said one expert: “The good news is that you can change yourself, which may lead you to behave differently with your partner, resulting in your partner deciding to change his or her behavior. Essentially what you do is calmly but firmly confronts the toxic behavior.”

But it may not be that easy because some people just refuse to change. However, nothing is impossible to God.

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The talent haters

No two people were wired the same. As our thumb prints differ, so do our gifts and purpose on earth. Your talents are powered by your God-given gifts.

You were created for a specific purpose, and wired to achieve it. So you are your best you can be and happiest in your gift zone.

In the development of you gifts and in pursuit of your purpose on earth, people you should try to avoid, as much as possible, are those who disrespect your gift/talent, and try to discourage you. Many Nollywood actors and actresses; popular comedians and footballers had been discouraged by their parents. And some people who were declared dumb in school by their teachers turned out to be some of the world’s brightest and the best.

The picture gets clearer with examples:

King Sunny Ade: The parents of this famous musician wanted him at the university, rather than playing music in the streets. He said in a newspaper interview: “When I realised that nobody in the family wanted me to dance or watch those who danced or played music, it did not occur to me to wish to become a musician……

“When I was leaving Abeokuta for Lagos, I actually told some colleagues that I was going to Lagos to try my luck but that if my family asked of me, they should tell them that I gained admission to University of Lagos.

“For almost three years, my family thought I was in the University in Lagos. It was not until I formed my own group that an uncle came and asked me whether I was actually Sunny Ade….He almost slapped me. My family didn’t approve of what I was doing for almost 15 years until I really made the name.’

Madonna: She was rejected by a music producer, Jimmy, in letter sent before 1982, when she released her first, self-titled album, which has sold more than 10 million copies worldwide.

J.K. Rowling: The writer was rejected by about 12 different publishers. One of them even advised her to “not quit her day job.”

Stephen King: His first novel, Carrie, was rejected 30 times before it was published. Carrie, went on to become a readers’ favourite and spawned four movies.

Thomas Edison: was fired by Western Union after he spilled Sulfuric acid on the floor. I guess leaving a hole on the floor of your office is grounds enough to be fired. But then again, that gave him enough time to pursue his real passion: invention.