i am angry! I am pained! My emotions are running riot now, because I know that if we don’t keep having this conversation and setting new agendas, one day, it will come to haunt generations yet unborn.
Honestly, I am more afraid for the younger generation and I think this should just end with my generation. I really don’t know why I feel this way but I know I am very mad at the society now and as I am writing this I am breathing fire and brimstones.
So what is my rant all about? Well, it all started when President Muhammadu Buhari named Aishah Ahmad as the new Deputy Governor of the Central Bank of Nigeria. Wow! I was super excited that a young beautiful woman got nominated for the position. I jumped and laughed like I had won the grand prize in a lottery.
Although, I was really happy for her because she attained such a success at that age, but my joy wasn’t about her alone, it was much more than that. My joy became boundless because, I know that women don’t have to be old and grey before they get to certain positions in life. I was happy because young people are gradually coming into the mainstream of leadership. I saw a ray of hope for every young woman in Nigeria, that if we are given equal chance we can do as much as our male counterparts.
Pronto! I began to soar high to cloud nine because I suddenly realized that the future is glittering bright for the girl-child in our country.
But somewhere along the line my celebratory moment was cut short and I flipped to the other side of the coin because of some things I was reading. I became livid and angry. Probably, I felt this way because I thought every Nigerian should have seen this as a victory for women but no, some men came out spitting bile on social media.
One of the comments reads: “Aisha must have slept her way through.” Oh! What a comment from a messed up brain! While some felt because she is a woman that position shouldn’t be for her and others felt she wasn’t properly covered and blab blah, blah! My goodness! I swallowed a lot of nonsense over the week but I survived it.
However, at a phase in my emotional rollercoaster, I realized that it is a common belief in Nigeria that every woman that is high up there must have slept her way there. In their little minds they can’t imagine how a woman can be brilliant or how she can excel in her career without help from a man.
Besides, I hold the opinion that it is only people with little or no reasoning that believe that every woman who is career oriented must have achieved her gold medals and trophies by strategically offering her vagina to the highest bidder.
For these people, it doesn’t matter if you are married or not, as long as you are a woman, you are not worth more than what is in between your thighs.
I find it demeaning that if a woman is high up there, she automatically attains the ashewo level. Even when she is down there, she is called the same thing. Women are being slut-shamed day-in day-out for no just reason. It doesn’t even matter if a girl or woman is sexually promiscuous or even utters any expression of sexuality, she would be labeled.
This has been going on for many years because slut shaming is really just a catchy way to describe old fashion sexism.
Aren’t you guys tired of passing on the same old garbage from one generation to the other? Why can’t you just shut the hell up, if you can’t celebrate a woman that is moving up high?
Why do some men feel intimidated when women are excelling better than them? Bros! Why do you take delight in pulling women down? Does a brilliant woman reduce the size of your manhood? Why do you have to tear a woman’s success story to shreds because you think her dressing doesn’t meet certain standards? Who are you to set standards for women and define the way they should look?
I really don’t get it and I’m screaming for answers. A man who can’t stand a female boss at the office will beat up his wife at home. A man who is jealous of her female boss will ensure that his wife’s voice is stifled.
That is why many men are now submission enforcement agents, they keep going on and on about submission and I am like what the heck! In a marriage no one is superior to the other person because if you truly love your spouse there won’t be any reason for power struggle. Hey! Please don’t bring in religion and culture into this! Yea, I have had enough of that because most of these “submission Mopol officers” are only selfish men who derive joy in subjecting women to footmats. Go and read your religious books very well and unearth all the cultural stones that have traditions and culture inscribed on them. If you purge your hearts and do your research properly, you will realize that if you love your wife selflessly there won’t be any need for you to scream submission into her ears. If you love her unconditionally, she will always do your bid and the same thing applies to your wife too.
All these things must stop! I am still fuming and my emotions are surging because women can no longer be oppressed by patriarchy.
So, if you are from the school of thought that believes that every woman who is high up is there because she has a sugar daddy somewhere, please go have a brain re-set; not all women at the peak of their career compromised. Women have brains and they are intelligent; they are not a sort of dumb ass horny pot. I think I need to quickly re-gig our brains here: was there a time that JAMB had lower or different cut off marks for women?
Of course not! At the university, we all burned the late night candle in school. We all did TDB (till day break reading) rituals, we dipped our feet into cold water so that we won’t fall asleep, we drank many cups of coffee to make sleep go away and we battled with a million mosquitoes, just to get prepared for exams. And there was never a time when the question paper given to the women were different from the men. Moreover, some of the women even floored their male classmates during exams. So, why should we be treated as Second Class citizens? Why shouldn’t we be promoted when we deserve it?
Oh! Please just stop the irrelevant balderdash you have been going on and about. Women are taking over and you cannot do anything about it. In fact, it is glaring that these people are afraid because things are spinning out of their control. They no longer have women where they feel they should, so the least you can all do is to come on board and let’s drink to that.
However, to the women who have believed the lies that for a woman to get high up there, she must sleep her way through. Jump out of your reveries of lies; you don’t need to put yourself in awkward positions because you need a promotion. You don’t need to dress seductively to attain greater heights. Even if your male boss is asking for it, you have a choice to walk away from it. Let your boss judge you by your skills and not by your sexual exploits.
Having numerous sexual escapades on your career path won’t take you far but what will take you far is your intelligence and professionalism.
Get in here folks! In case you don’t understand all my rants, the summary is just that women are no longer playthings that are only good for sex. We are here no longer the footmat that you love to trample upon; no-no! Right now there is a new crop of women who exploit their feminity in a way that commands respect. These women are not just pretty faces with nothing upstairs, they are sophisticated, sassy and intelligent. Be warned! If care is not taken, you could easily get intimidated by their sense of style or catch a whiff of their expensive, breezy perfumes.
But these ones owe no one an apology because they are unlike yesterday’s women, these new ones are gods!
No matter what you say to them, they don’t care and they will be rocking the throne of their careers as long as they want.