“My husband had told me their names were Kagiso and Lesedi but NEVER in my wildest dream would I have believed that fate would be this cruel to me.”

Efe Anaughe

“I am used to a life of comfort so why should I settle for less? Lesedi and I were both young when we met, we probably didn’t manage our relationship well. Bottom line? We went our separate ways. Years later, I met Dingane in South Africa when I returned home; he is much older than me but sure knows how to spoil a girl. We didn’t date for long since we both knew what we wanted. Dingane really loved my model like shape and looks and I? Well he wasn’t bad looking but most importantly Dingane is filthy rich and I am a girl that loves comfort and the good things of life. You probably think I am a gold digger but in my own way I love him.

READ ALSO: “I MARRIED my husband because of his money!”

Things were really rosy for a while between us. I had jewellery, clothes and even had more shoes and bags than Imelda Marcos. I travelled round the five continents and my life was just one big roller coaster ride. I knew how to catch my fun.

“Do you Ladies remember Bidemi?” Jasmine and I nodded. “We did our A-levels with her,” she continued. “In fact if it were not for Bidemi, I wouldn’t have written this story. Whenever she comes visiting to South Africa, we hang out a lot together. She has a good listening ear and has been there for me. Any wonder she is the only friend I have been able to open up to against the express wishes of my husband. After spending some years together, life could not have been happier. Then my husband’s children by his first wife who lives in England decided to visit their father in South Africa. Ordinarily that should be a happy occasion but I was apprehensive.

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Would they like me? Would they think I am a gold digger and didn’t love their Dad? I wondered. Up until then I had never been unfaithful to my husband, so why was I jittery? Maybe because I was so much younger than my husband. I really didn’t know what it was that I was uncomfortable with. Take your pick; it could be some of the above or all of the above. Maybe I had a premonition of what was going to happen. Anyway Dingane’s kids finally arrived. That evening I paced up and down the balcony extremely nervous. Dingane kept reassuring me that they would love me. When they finally showed up, the driver came down first and opened the door. At this time my husband and I were standing on the front porch.

My husband had told me their names were Kagiso and Lesedi but NEVER in my wildest dream would I have believed that fate would be this cruel to me. Standing right in front of me was ‘my Lesedi’, I was rooted to the spot. I opened my mouth but no words came out, I was in a state of shock. Fortunately Dingane was too busy kissing and hugging Kagiso, he didn’t notice. It was probably at this point or when we were alone, I should have said something but I said nothing, either at that point or later. My moment passed and Lesedi was hugging his Dad and they were slapping each other’s backs. I stood there like a dutiful wife, waiting for my husband to do the introductions. When he did, Kagiso and Lesedi were both extremely polite and courteous. Lesedi did not bat an eyelid. He shook my hands solemnly and commended his Dad for finding such a beautiful woman and hoping to find someone this beautiful for himself. The tempo of my heartbeat increased because seeing Lesedi brought all the memories back. I was almost overwhelmed with my feelings for Lesedi as they came back full force. We had dinner that night and we all went to bed early. It was an emotional night and we were all drained, especially me.

I lay awake in bed with my husband sleeping by my side, battling within me, undecided if I should do the honourable thing and come out clean…..”

READ ALSO: WE don’t touch that stuff not even to experiment, thank goodness!


Warien Rose Foundation’s Domestic Violence Anonymous held on the last Monday as usual at Golden Tulip Festac; Jasmine and I were in attendance.