if I am asked for advice on the choice of man for a woman, with the advantage of age, experience and knowledge of God, I will choose a God-fearing man. But studies show woman prefer other traits, some really flimsy.
Online polls conducted by Opinion Research Corporation, and BestLifeOnline.com, and published by Mens World, show some interesting results. In Lagos, as in most Nigerian cities, many men would not need studies to know the traits women look for. They say for many Lagos women, the bottom line is money. That may however be an over-generalisation because many women, especially the more mature ones in Lagos need to settle down to lasting relationships and therefore look beyond money.
Women in the above studies rated the preferred traits as follows:
Character traits
Faithfulness, 84 percent: More than 8 out of 10 women rated “faithful to me” in the top 10 attributes they find sexy in a man. A woman’s tendency toward attachment is a biological imperative, a matter of raising offspring right. Reassure her (often) that you’re not going anywhere.
Dependability, 75 percent: Three out of four women say they look for a man who makes commitments and follows through. Being responsible!
Kindness, 67 percent: Young women may still fall for the bad-boy type, but more-mature women are turned on by kindness, because kindness inspires confidence. In other words, if you treat the waitress well, your date figures you’ll treat her well, too.
Moral Integrity, 66 percent: Having the guts to tell the truth means to a woman that you have the guts to be a good, caring, decent partner over the long haul.
Personality Traits
Sense of Humor, 77 percent: Being able to laugh at the stresses of this world is a must, according to the women on our panel. You get bonus points if you can make them laugh. Humor tells a woman that you can laugh at—read, handle easily—the many difficulties that life throws at you.
Intelligence, 55 percent: A worldy, interesting man is a man she likes to show off. Men who are take-charge problem solvers make women feel secure, and men who are always improving are never boring.
Passion, 46 percent: Women like displays of passion because they’re not accustomed to seeing them from men. Get passionate about something: kayaking, impressionistic art, barbecuing, or Habitat for Humanity. It’s proof that you care for and about something beyond yourself.
Confidence, 41 percent: A man who feels secure in his own skin makes the woman he’s with feel secure. By showing you can handle unfamiliar people or situations, you tell the woman in your life that she need not fear, either.
Generosity, 38 percent: This is more important to women over 35 than it is to those under that age. This is not all about money. Willingness to give your time and lend your ear is what women crave is important.
Practical skills
Listening, 53 percent: Pay attention. A woman feels safe and secure when she knows her man will put down his BlackBerry and listen to her. Magic words: “I’m here. Tell me everything.”
Earning Potential, 21 percent: One in five women surveyed said a man’s successfulness in his career contributes to his sexiness. If you’ve demonstrated talent, goal achievement, and follow-through, you give women confidence that you will be a good provider.
Physical attributes
Sense of Style, 30 percent: The way you dress reflects on the woman you’re with, and she knows it. The man who knows how to match a patterned shirt and tie will notice when she’s dressed well, too.
Handsome Face, 26 percent: The science of attraction, which has been studied ad infinitum, says it’s all about symmetry.
Height, 15 percent: Tall, dark, and handsome isn’t the be-all and end-all. Women say they like feeling smaller than their men, but height doesn’t necessarily mean might. They will feel comfortable as long as they aren’t towering over you.
Muscular Build, 13 percent: Nearly three times as many women value a clean-shaven face over the clean and jerk. Muscles help ward off rivals and assure a woman that you won’t drop her during a dip, but your overall appearance is more important than the size of your biceps.
Fitness, 12 percent: Women recognize a good body as indicative of a man of discipline and self-control. It tells a woman you can keep up with her, in bed and out. Women recognize a good body as indicative of a man of discipline and self-control. It tells a woman you can keep up with her, in bed and out.
Latest study
But in a 2017 study published in the journal Evolutionary Psychological Science, although women say they prefer the personality traits of friendliness and respectfulness, but new research reveals it’s really all about looks. When tested, women pick men who are physically attractive over those with better personality traits. They pay lip service to personality traits. Younger women, in particular, pay little attention to whether men are trustworthy, respectful and honest — just whether they are fit.
Older women do pay a little more attention to personality, but only when choosing between attractive men.
The conclusions come from a study of 80 women aged between 15 and 29 and their mothers. The results revealed that personality made little difference when men were unattractive.
Professor Madeleine Fugère, the study’s first author, said: “We conclude that a minimum level of physical attractiveness is a necessity for both women and their mothers.”
Younger women were also more picky when choosing between the men.
Mothers, though, rated more of the attractive men as suitable for their daughters.
Professor Fugère said: “This may signal that unattractiveness is less acceptable to women than to their mothers.
It might also mean that women and their mothers may have different notions of what constitutes a minimally acceptable level of physical attractiveness, with mothers employing a less stringent standard than their daughters.”
When the women were asked directly about the importance of personality, they all paid it lip service. They said that friendliness and respectfulness were more important than physical attractiveness.
Conclusion
A God-fearing man has an active conscience and is therefore likely to have many of these positive attributes and also treat a woman with the golden rule: Do to others what you want done to you!