I have received messages from young men asking me to link them up with sugar mummies. There is no week that I don’t receive a message from a young man who wants an older woman who can foot his bills because the economy is hard. In fact, one of them even suggested that he wants to become my sugar boy. When I asked him how old he was, he said 20 years and I laughed.

When I don’t respond to these messages, some of them accuse me of trying to stop the good things that life has in store for them for refusing to link them up with rich, older women. Some of their messages leave me tired and angry at the same time. I get angry because I don’t understand how someone will decide to be a sugar boy because of money while his mates are busy working hard to make the same money.

How did we get here as a people? When did things get so bad that young boys who are supposed to be thinking about how to succeed and make something out of their lives are only thinking of how to get lost in older women’s valley of pleasure instead of working hard to make a living?

These young boys between the ages of 18 and 25 now scheme to date older women instead of dating their mates. It’s like they have been anointed and released to go after these women just to keep body and soul together. They don’t even have shame anymore. They don’t hide it. They tell upfront that they can give you good sex if you are interested but you must pay for their time and efforts. The world is truly coming to an end.

Many of these young men have no jobs and some of them don’t even have the desire to do that. They want quick money with minimal efforts. They don’t believe in the dignity of labour but prefer to labour in the erotic vineyard of old women. They believe that giving these women sex in exchange for money and a lavish lifestyle is the best way to make quick money. And many of them are actually living large.

Many of them have no viable means of livelihood but live in good houses, drive expensive cars and wear expensive designer’s clothes. Many of them throw money around without categorically stating what they do for a living. They are into the business of oiling the rig of older women and they are proud of it. The greedy ones can even have many older women by the side just to make more money. Are these boys not prostitutes too?

In the past, this is not so. The thought of older women dating or having sex with younger men was considered a taboo. It cannot be explained but many people frown at seeing older women with younger boys. They will sneer at you if you are seen in public with a woman older than you and it is clear you both are enjoying sexual communion.

While older men who date women decades younger have always been completely accepted, the opposite is the case for women. In fact, men who leave their wives to hook up with a younger babe have become a common occurrence that some people no longer frown at it. It is seen and accepted as normal. Sometimes they tell the wives of these men who have been abandoned for younger women to continue praying to God to touch their hearts to return home.

But today, things have changed. Young, jobless boys are venturing into the secret places of older women just to live large and give them pleasure in return. It has become the in thing to latch unto a rich, older woman who is probably lonely and sex starved and supply them what they are lacking for material gains. Sometimes, it is said that these women are very diabolical and use the destiny of these boys to shine, but I don’t know how true that is. 

We see such boys everywhere. They hang around shopping malls, bars and salons, looking for perceived rich woman to prey on. They flatter these women, appeal to their sexuality, capture them with sweet talks and tell them what they want to hear just to obtain money.

They are also on different social media platforms hunting for women to go into a relationship with. They lack manners. They don’t have respect for their elders. How can you be asking out a woman who is old enough to be your mother because you don’t want to work and make money like your mates? Why do these boys think that a woman’s life starts and ends with sex that they offer it to older women shamelessly?

Why would a young man, instead of thinking and working for a better future, decide to live his life around the vagina of a woman who does nothing but use him to satisfy her sexual urges? Why do parents also encourage some of their sons to tow this path without thinking of how it would affect their future? What do these boys think will happen to them in the future when things no longer go as planned? How will they survive if they no longer see women to fund this lifestyle?

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In many cities in Nigeria, these boys ply their trade recklessly and they have the nerves to call prostitutes names even when they are in the same line of business. These boys loaf around everyday waiting for Princess charming to come and rescue them from poverty and lack. It’s a shame! Young boys, get off your lazy butts and go get something doing that is dignifying.

These women help their boys with mouth-watering government contracts and big time jobs. They rent them apartments, buy them choice cars, give them pocket monies and collect these investments back from their many energy-sapping sexual sessions. I am trying to picture a 20-year-old humping a 50-year-old woman because of money. It is nauseating to say the least.

I just pity girls who run after material things and comfort without knowing how their boyfriends make their money. When they take you to clubs, boutiques and give you money, just have it at the back of your mind that you are enjoying big mummy’s allowance. You can’t even complain because you are not contributing anything meaningful to your relationship other than opening your hand to receive money. And when you talk too much, you are sacked at the orders of big mummy because she is the one in control.

These boys have also carried their business into many corporate settings. They have resorted to being their older female boss’s sex pets in exchange for a life of luxury. They are the ones who come to work whenever they like, they leave the office whenever they like, and they insult the manager at every slight provocation. They go against all the laid down rules of the company but get promotion instead of query or sack letter at the end of the day. And these ones call themselves men too, they refuse to see that they are boy toys madam uses and discards at will.

Even if you see yourself as a failure in life, you don’t have to descend so low for crumbs. It is a shameful thing for a man to sell his pride just to exist. Let me tell you, you boys are not living life. These sugar mummies will give you all the good things of life but you can’t be relaxed because you don’t know when you will be replaced. You will be constantly on your toes and penis looking for ways to please her for fear of being replaced.

Let me ask you boys, what happens when you suddenly fall from grace to grass in her books? Where will you start from? How will you survive? Why would you get involved in a relationship where you don’t have a say? Where are you returning to if your sugar mummy dies suddenly? How meaningful will your life be by then after they have drained you of bodily fluids and virility?

Some sugar mummies have destroyed the lives of their younger lovers. Boy, don’t think you are too smart. She knows what you are doing, but she is waiting for the right time to strike. She knows you use the car she bought for you to pick your girls, have sex with them and even propose to some. She knows you used her money to rent an apartment for your young lover. But she is only waiting to get another gigolo like you to continue tilling her secret land before she strips you of everything she has given you.

You people are jumping around selling sex for money because you think you are the best thing that happened to a woman’s secret place. Even when you get a job, you turn it down because you feel the money involved is not enough for you. You have also refused to start a business with the little money your uncle offered you because your big eyes are focused on a rich, older woman’s valley.

And you women who have refused to respect yourselves because of sex, what is it? Why have you made it your duty to train small boys in the art of giving and receiving orgasms? Why have you captured the brains of these boys that they are now glued to your honey pot? Why are you sugar mummies so demanding that your boys have to resort to feigning sickness just to get away from their many mountain climbing duties with you? This is not good.

Small boys, listen, no matter how many sugar mummies you date and sleep with, you will lose out in the end. No matter how much money they give you, you will still be poor because you are just a play thing. Don’t think you are so special. All they want from you is to enjoy sex, have orgasms and move on.

The reason you are important now is that some of their husbands can no longer perform their primary assignment and you are the perfect replacement for them. Your functional staff of office is what they need to fulfil their sexual fantasies. Forget about taking advantage of the sheer excitement your sugar mummies bring to the bedroom, they are just draining you of seminal fluid.

My question is this: All these small boys who specialise in dating older women just to become sex toys because they want to live the good life without working for it, don’t you have any future ambition? Will you be proud to tell your children what you did for a living? Will you be proud to tell them that your job was to take drugs and shag older women for money? Think about it.