At the Evangel Pentecostal Church, on August 20, I ministered on the Christian husband. That is, the born-again husband; the redeemed of the Lord; the man, who decrees a thing and it will be established, that is, God’s friend, whose weapons of warfare are not carnal but mighty through God to the pulling down of strongholds. I mean the uncle, who casts down imaginations and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God. He is the man, who brings into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ. It is not about the husband, who believes that all other wives are born-again, brilliant and beautiful, except his wife!
The Christian husband is the General Overseer of his family. God, therefore, holds him responsible for the things that take place in his family. It was Mummy Eve, who started it all, when she allowed the devil to deceive her. She then introduced the forbidden fruit to Adam, her spouse. It was Adam, however, as the head of the family, that God held responsible for the act. The foundation a man lays is what he will reap. It will affect the future generation of his family. What type of foundation are you building, or have you built for your children, grandchildren and great-grand children? It is all in the choices and decisions you are making now.
For success, a Christian husband must love God. In Gen. 12:1-5, God gave Abraham a great task by telling him to leave his family, tribe and country for an unnamed place and he obliged. That portrayed his love for God above all else. It brought a great benefit to him, his family, and even to us, the gentile world. The Lord Jesus came out of his loins.
A Christian husband must love his wife. Ask every husband whether he loves his wife and he will respond in the positive. It is important to note four things about this love. In the first place, it is a divine command: ‘Husbands, love your wives,’ Eph. 5:25 tells us. When a command is given, personal opinion on the matter is not required. Non-compliance is rebellion. There is no way God will answer the prayers of a rebellious husband. Secondly, before joining a couple, the officiating minister asks the man whether he will love his bride. He vows that he will do so. That vow is unconditional. If he breaks it later for whatever reason, and God breaks His own vow concerning him, for sure, the man will not wake up from sleep the next day.
The bad news about this love is that a wife knows if she is loved. This is where the wahala dey! Some husbands buy clothes, expensive fabrics, all the time, for their wives, but unfortunately, beyond that, a wife knows when she is loved. Some husbands give huge amounts of money to their wives for their personal use, but unfortunately, a wife knows when she is loved. Some men send their wives and children abroad on summer vacation yearly, but unfortunately, a wife knows when she is loved. After all, sending her and the children abroad may be to pave way for Uncle and his secretary or housemaid, to be doing in their house, what they have been doing in the hotels and in secret. A certain man bought a 505 car, when it was in vogue, for his wife and employed a driver for her, she still complained to me that her husband did not love her. A girlfriend is moved by cash and gifts, but a wife, by love. A wife knows whether Uncle ever involves her in his decision-making processes. A wife knows whether her opinion is ever accepted by or applauded by her husband. A wife knows whether she is treated as a wife or as a maid.
Another distinction about this love is that God wants it to be, ‘As Christ loved the Church’, His bride. This is the benchmark for husbands. Jesus loved His Church by dying for her. We, His bride, know this. A husband must be ready to die for his wife. He should also love her beyond her knowledge. If I fly from Lagos to London, I may not know what could have happened to the airplane, when we were in flight. Perhaps, the fuel finished and because I was there, Jesus prevented it from crashing. There is no way I would know. Love! An armed robber could have told his colleague that they should raid my house and their Oga showed him a flaming sword on my roof, warning him that it will be suicidal to do so. Who prevented them but Jesus! I will not know. Love! I open my wife’s mailbox and reply some of her mails and also handle some of her assignments, most of the time, without informing her. Love! We should thus love our wives beyond their knowledge.
There are certain things a husband will do, or refrain from doing. It is love that compels him, against all pressures, to behave in a particular manner. Theory and practice are not the same. In Matt. 19:5, Jesus said concerning a couple: ‘They are no longer two but one’. That is why He tells them in Matt. 18:19, ‘If two of you shall agree concerning anything you will ask, it will be done for you’. If they live as hermits, God will not answer their prayers. Why should a man not live in unity with his prayer-partner, and the best lady in the wide-world, he chose to marry? Why should he not live in love with a woman, who had left her parents and deleted her dad’s name from her name to answer his?
My wife and I are one. I open her email box more than three times a day, more than she does. I reply some of her mails before she reads them. She opens by box too and so do all our children. We are a family! I do what I do because we are one. A certain lady I never met used to harass me with her calls at night. I would give my phone to my wife to answer her. That was how she stopped disturbing me. And so it was with her, when a certain Uncle was harassing her with his calls. I told her to invite him to our church the day she was preaching. She did. Uncle replied that he was living at Abuja. That brought his calls to an end.
Uncle Nabal and Abigail in 1Sam 25, did not enjoy this oneness. He once had issues with David and did not tell his wife. Not paying him with his coins, when she was brought into the picture by someone, Abigail went ahead and rescued him. He also threw a lavish party in his house, without informing nor involving her. With divine wisdom, she managed the issue, not fighting him nor disclosing to him that night, the death sentence she had rescued him from. Some husbands like him are in many families, churches and in the industry. May they repent so that the fate of Nabal will not be their portion!
For further comment, Please contact: Osondu Anyalechi: 0802 3002-471;[email protected]