RapistsAllegation of gang rapes trailed a recent musical concert featuring Afro-pop star, Chinedu Okoli popularly known as Flavour. The musical concert was held at the Micheal Okpara Square, Enugu penultimate Saturday. Many young girls alleged that they were raped at the event while many others claimed they were sexually harassed. Ever since I read the report I have been overwhelmed by emotions and I am really pained that such a thing could happen in modern Nigeria. Please how many people have been arrested and charged to court since the story broke?

The most annoying thing is that some people are busy making excuses for this incident. How can someone with blood flowing through his veins make an excuse for these monsters? Do you know the kind of pain and torments these women have been through? Do you know how their individual self esteem has been torn into shreds? I became very worried when I started reading some comments on social media about this issue and it hit me hard how some people trivialize rape incidents.  Some were asking very silly questions like what were the girls looking for at the show? Some asked what they wore to the show and some other stupid questions I can’t remember.  But why shouldn’t a lady go to a musical concert?  Why shouldn’t a woman wear whatever she wants to a musical show?  So a woman can’t enjoy the same privileges as a man because she has a vagina? A woman can’t go wherever she wants because of some badly raised boys? I am angry because year in year out we keep making the same excuses for these rapists. We encourage them to assault our women by our utterances. We come up with flimsy stories like they were under the influence of drugs and so they shouldn’t be held responsible for their foolish acts. Many rapists are like lead actors, they enjoy all the circus show of our pretentious legal system while the victims are slut-shamed. If these guys are eventually caught, I am certain the case will drag on for so long that these girls will be emotionally raped over and over again. Probably, after a while there will be no convictions and further pain will be inflicted on the victims.  It is a pity that as I write this piece, some of these rapists will be somewhere laughing and drinking to their shameful conquest.  That is why many women and young girls who got raped never come out to tell. It is rather unfortunate that our bodies have become a public toilet where touts and any never-do-well can come and discharge their smelly semen. It is sad that our women are not safe. They assault us physically, emotionally while the custodian of our laws look away and pretend it never happened. I am angry that our bodies as women have become a consolation prize to hooligans and never-do-wells in the society. They place a bet on our most prized possession and discard us like used tissue paper. It breaks my heart that people tell rape victims that they asked for it.

The rape culture in our country is raging like wildfire and if nothing is done on time it will become a way of life. The rape culture suggests that a woman who says no actually means yes. They tell you that a woman’s silence means consent; that a woman who gets wet during rape wants it badly. Please tell me who enjoys being stripped naked? Who enjoys being gagged during sex?  Who enjoys being beaten during sex? Who enjoys being talked down or abused during sex? Who enjoys being fingered and thrown by the roadside? How can a screaming woman with torrents of tears enjoy what you are doing with her? Tell me who enjoys this beastly act?   What happened in Enugu has suddenly become a circus and every nincompoop with nothing upstairs has been saying gibberish to defend the heinous crime. They have been screaming their foolishness in my ears that rape is caused by the victim’s own personal choices. They are telling our girls not to wear miniskirts, don’t wear see-through and no one deems it right to talk to the boys on how to quell their sexual urge.

  They think women who are strongly opinioned should be sexually violated so that they will be broken. It is only in a country like Nigeria that comedians will crack jokes with rape and people will stupidly laugh at it instead of walking out on such show. Rape can’t be for entertainment! It is a traumatic experience.

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Unfortunately, rape is happening in every nook and cranny of the country. It happens in schools, homes, religious centres, everywhere. The only people who carry the pain and shame are the survivors, the ones society tells us to heap the blame on. The ones who were told they were raped because they were promiscuous. The ones we are told dressed provocatively and so they deserved to be sexually violated. These people they hardly know but because they own a vagina and they were raped by these beasts, they are the guilty ones. The raped victims are the ones with all the character flaws. It is saddening that many Nigerian trains of thoughts are like this. It breaks my heart that some people prefer to see reasons for a rapist than the victims. Mind you, rape isn’t about gender or privileges. It is more about the sick mind of the perpetrators. It is more about decency. I think it is time everyone who talks from both sides of their mouth keeps their mouth sealed. I am talking about those who say they want justice yet they make excuses for these men from hell. I am talking to people who are hypocritical about these issues, those who enjoy preying on women and those who abuse them. I think they should all be banished to hell with these rapists.

They are the ones corrupting the justice system. They are the ones who won’t let us have a sex offender list.  This list helps us to know who is who amongst us and when there is any sexual offence it helps the police to know where to beam their searchlight of investigation on. However, I also think it is high time we stopped trading blames when a woman is raped. Rape is never the victim’s fault. Please, there is no way you are going to convince me that a woman asked to be raped. No matter how drunk or high you are, you should never touch women inappropriately. Even if a woman is flirting with you that doesn’t mean she wants sex. If a woman is wearing a skimpy dress on 8inch stilettos that is not an automatic ticket for you to touch her indecently. In addition to this, if a woman is drunk or unconscious, any form of penetration is rape. Never touch a woman who didn’t give you consent!  Learn to keep your sexual urge in check.  Silence doesn’t mean yes!

To every woman reading this, always make sure you keep yourself safe all the time. Never go to places you are not sure of your safety. Rapists don’t have it inscribed on their foreheads that they are rapists so be careful with the opposite sex. No matter how cute he is he might be a beast.  Majority of rape cases comes from people who are well known to you. I think for every woman reading this, you should always have a rape kit with you or go and learn some defense mechanisms. It can save you from a lot of problems.  It is high time we stopped normalizing sexual violence.  Stop making excuses for these men who should be castrated and locked up forever. But if you keep doing that, the tide might turn against you one day. But I pray that you never get to find your daughter butt naked and unconscious near a canal raped by a sweet boy with a winning smile.