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Before now, many people believe that long-distance relationships hardly work. Family members discourage their relations from pursuing it. Some friends also kick against the idea in order to protect their loved ones from heartbreak.
Long distance relationships are not easy to sustain. The distance makes many things difficult. Things could get complicated, and one could become sad and lonely at times. However, the long distance can also make the smallest things mean much more in a long distance relationship.
These men and women shared how they are keeping their love alive and strong in long distance relationships.
Edwin: The distance made us more committed to each other
It is not easy to be in a long distant relationship. The main pillars of such a relationship are trust and commitment. She is in Delta State and I am in Lagos. Since we graduated from the university, we have become inseparable. I’ve been enjoying it so much. This is because the distance made us more committed and the love stronger. We have been together for three years now.
Chinyere: It hurts that I can’t see him daily
I have been in a long distance relationship for a year now. We were never the long talk couple, unless there’s something important to discuss. We talk three times daily and that has been the normal routine. The communication is cool. It’s not like I see him every day when I was close to him, but that feeling that I can’t see him whenever I want to, now, is what hurts terribly. But we love each other and that’s the most important thing.
Segun: We are having the fun of our lives
I will say long distance relationship is fun. We were in different countries and it was great. You just need to be constantly communicating. You should be understanding as well as trustworthy. I cheated sometimes but that doesn’t stop me from loving my girl. I won’t tell her that, she will never forgive me. We are having the fun of our lives loving each other from different countries.
Vera: I don’t expect him to be faithful and he knows he doesn’t expect the same from me
I have been in a long distance relationship for three years now. I love my space, no monitoring spirit. But communication and trust is the key. There are times we stay up eight months without even seeing each other. He’s currently in the East while I’m in the North. It has been four months since we saw each other but we Skype, chat and engage in phone sex. I don’t expect him to be faithful and he knows he doesn’t expect the same from me but we are cool with our arrangement.
David: We build our relationships on phone calls
My girlfriend lives in Bayelsa and I am in Asaba. We were both in Port Harcourt for school. Then at different times from 2013 till date, we started living separately. We have survived many challenges in our relationship. We fight and very hard too but we can’t do without each other. We are surviving. We built our relationships on phone calls and occasional visits.
Zara: We give each other space
We enjoy commitment on both sides. Understanding, respect, communication, kindness with words, sexual compatibility and boldness to express it over phone or through Skype remain our relationship secrets. Most importantly, couples in long distance relationships have to trust each other.
It has been one year now we started dating and it has really been amazing. We talk daily. He lives in Dallas and I live in Nigeria. We started as friends first which made things easier. There are no limits to what we talk about. He is allowed to go out to clubs or wherever he wants and I am allowed to go out too.
Whenever we have a misunderstanding, we talk about it the next day, trash out the issue and laugh over it. Trust is the key. He has his space and time and I have mine as well. I don’t being choked in a relationship. I am looking forward to having the best time of my life with him.
Mike: Communication and trust made our relationship work
I somehow like long distance relationships. It gives me a good amount of freedom. I don’t like clingy women. I love being missed and missing my partner a little. I’m in one, and we see each other as often as we get the chance. Communication and trust are key to a successful distance relationship for me
Michelle: Being in long distance relationship requires emotional maturity
Distance does not ruin a relationship; doubts and suspicions do. Being in a long distance relationship requires emotional maturity, commitment and understanding. I am in one. I am in Abuja and he’s in Warri. We take turns to visit each other. We are planning to get married in May. I love him and he loves me, distance notwithstanding.
Chibueze: Her jealousy ruined our relationship
I tried it. I was in Lagos and she was in Akwa Ibom. She had me on choke hold; no breathing space. She believed any girl that liked my post on Facebook was a threat. And if I like someone’s picture, it is war. When I am online but not chatting with her because I am writing an article, she accuses me of flirting with someone else.
I had to be checking in with her countless times a day otherwise, I would be accused of cheating. If an emergency keeps me late in the hospital, I am to provide evidence and check in with her. If you say goodnight, and she catches you online by 2am, maybe you went to pee or something; you were sneaking around, cheating. I called it off after enduring her attitude for four months. She was choking me. I had no breathing space. I was almost losing my mind. Her jealousy ruined our relationship.
James: Distance strengthened our trust
I have been in a long distance relationship. It was an experience of worth. I was an undergraduate at the University of Calabar and she was in the University of Uyo. She was also a year ahead of me and graduated before me. She started working as a banker after she relocated to Lagos State.
So, Lagos to Calabar it was. No more 2 hours 30 minutes journey, so seeing each other once every month ended. Trust wasn’t an issue. I earned hers as she did mine. But there was a twist to our relationship later on. After my graduation, I wanted to stay in Cross River State to get a job and that was when the warning came.
“If you stay in Calabar throughout this month and you refuse to relocate down to Lagos, consider this relationship officially ended.” I had to listen to her. Lagos wasn’t new to me. It is the land of my birth. I am glad she threatened me. Ours is a love made in Heaven. The distance strengthened our trust, though it wasn’t without issues, but we were determined to make it work. And we are still working at it.
Sam: I like it when my partner misses me so much
I have been in a long distance relationship for five months and still counting. Long distance relationship works perfectly for me. I like freedom. I like it when my partner misses me so much. Communication, understanding and trust are keys to successful long distance relationship. The loneliness can be hard to deal with sometimes and I am not a saint, but I don’t joke with my girlfriend. I love her and I know she loves me too. We are cool being apart from each other for now.