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Why you can’t succeed as an island

If you decide to do it alone, it may work for a while, but nature will take its toll at some point. We all need the contributions of others to succeed

Ladi Ayodeji

The famous English poet John Donne wrote: “No man is an island, entirely of itself; every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main.” This truth has universal application and it can stand for all eternity. We are created as independent beings yet completely dependent on each other.

Some folks think that because they are rich, powerful and famous, they don’t need anyone for anything. That is pride and delusion. It is a false sense of security. Those who think like that are on an ego trip to self-destruction because they do not realise that when they die, they cannot bury themselves. The truth is that we all need each other, regardless of our station in life.

The rich need the poor in their mansions, if only to serve in some capacity as janitor, driver, security guard, cooks, etc. For the same reason, the famous and powerful also need the poor and must live with them because it is mutually beneficial.

READ ALSO: In Nigeria, the poor is subsidising the rich –Yusuf

The chaste or righteous must live with the sinner, if only to convert them and lead them to heaven. We need each other whether we like it or not, God made us that way. Some people who come into wealth, power or some position of influence often draw a line that cordons them off their “less fortunate” friends or family members. Those who behave like this don’t know that power, money or position is transient

It is wise to keep your folks because, if you climb up, you may need them to climb down when adversity visits you. Never despise the days of humble beginnings. Bob Marley sang, “All the good friends we have, the good friends we lost, along the way …” A friend in power is a friend lost, I know that. That’s why I offer this admonition. Keep in touch when you are out of reach because of the demarcation of power, wealth or position.

No man or woman can be an island because man is a social animal. We live in communities. Even beasts of the jungle socialise with their kind. If you think you are too big to mix with the dirt-poor, find your peers. Go and live in gated luxury estates or in a posh villa. But by all means fellowship with others of your ilk.

Some guys like the late pop icon Michael Jackson lived their lives like a recluse. At a stage, he kept a snake as a pet. What manner of man is that? To be queer, lonely or eccentric is not a virtue. No normal person lives like that. We are all created with a balanced nature. We ought to live normal lives.

Take a critical look at loners, they are emotionally unstable or out of balance. Very often, they are queer, psychopathic, and some live on the verge of insanity. They do foolish things. They sometimes alarm neighbours with outrageous behaviour. They are easily disposed to murder, suicide or other acts of violence.

READ ALSO: Man kills father, commits suicide

The islander mentality is a function of pride. A guy thinks he is too good to mix. Thinking they are so special, they build a wall of Jericho around themselves to fend off beggarly friends or associates. These types of people don’t like to share. It is certainly a complex. If you exhibit this trait, please do away with it. It may kill you.

You have to get along with people to know what is going on in the world. Solitary confinement is a punishment even if they do it by choice. It is a self-imposed prison. But the effect is the same. All prisoners, whether self-imposed or compelled, suffer lack of freedom and the psychological consequences of it. If you decide to do it alone, it may work for a while, but nature will take its toll at some point. We all need the contributions of others to succeed in any venture.

Those who engage in solo sport like boxing, tennis, wresting, etc, will tell you that they have someone behind them. You must get people involved to succeed. Whoever feels he doesn’t need anybody is blowing hot air. It is empty pride. You cannot do it all alone. You can’t, nature won’t allow you even if you try. Greed is sometimes behind the desire to be alone. The propensity to have it all for yourself, which is the base nature of everyone, underscores the islander mentality.

READ ALSO: “Why are men so greedy? Worse! Some men are just plain stupid!”

What makes life interesting is to fellowship with one another. It is pure fun to share what you have with others. Nothing in life is ever created, invented or manufactured to serve a single individual. If there were such a product, it would serve no purpose. God is a God of fellowship who came down in the cool of the day to chat with Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden. We are created in the image of God; therefore, we should fellowship with one another, bless others so that we, too, can be blessed.

Remember, if you don’t want to share you may end up a loser. According to John Maxwell, “Separating oneself from others and trying to live the world alone is unhealthy. When you die, others will share all you had and kept for yourself while alive. Therefore, live and let go and let God.”

 

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Weekend spice: As a teacher, I can’t have a mixture of blessing and cursing coming out of my mouth – Joyce Meyer

Ok folks, thanks for reading. Stay motivated.

• Ladi Ayodeji is an author, rights activist, pastor and life coach. He can be reached on 09059243004 (SMS & WhatsApp only)
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