Some mothers often forget that children aren’t born with a built-in sense of respect for others. While each child has a different personality, all children need to be taught to be respectful.
From birth, children learn to manipulate their world to get their needs met, this is natural. But parents need to teach them respectful ways of doing things as they relate with others especially elders.
Some people wonder why some children have gotten so disrespectful these days. We see children and teens arguing with adults or ignoring them outright, using foul language, displaying bad attitude, and not using manners or respecting those in authority.
Sadly, this has become the norm for many children and teens. It is important for mothers to look at their children realistically, noting both their strengths and their areas of weakness. This allows them to see inappropriate behaviour as it happens and address it and not make excuses or ignore it.
So how can you change the culture in your own house if disrespectful behaviour is starting—or is already a way of life? Here are some things you can do as a mother to start getting respect back from your kids.
It’s not about your child liking you or even thanking you for what you do. It’s important to remember that your child is not your friend—he’s your child. Your job is to coach him to be able to function in the world.
This means teaching them to behave respectfully to others, not just you. When you think your child might be crossing the line, a good rule of thumb is to ask yourself, “Would I let the neighbour say these things to me? If the answer is no, don’t let your child do it, either.
Catch disrespect early. It’s good to catch disrespectful behaviour early. If your child is rude or disrespectful, don’t turn a blind eye. Intervene and say, “We don’t talk to each other that way in this family.” Giving consequences when your kids are younger is going to pay off in the long run.
It’s so important for you and your partner to be on the same page when it comes to your child’s behaviour. Make sure one of you isn’t allowing the disrespectful behaviour while the other is trying to intercede. Sit down together and talk about what your bottom lines are, and then come up with a plan of action and a list of consequences you might give if your child breaks the rules.
Teach your child basic social interaction skills. It may sound old fashioned, but it’s very important to teach your child basic manners like saying “please” and “thank you.” Understand that using manners just a simple “excuse me” or “thank you” is also a form of empathy. It teaches your kids to respect others and acknowledge their impact on other people. When you think about it, disrespectful behaviour is the opposite, negative side of being empathetic and having good manners.
Be respectful when you correct your child. When your child is being disrespectful, you as a parent need to correct them in a respectful manner. Yelling and getting upset and having your own attitude in response to theirs are not helpful. It often escalates bad behaviour. You don’t need to shout at them or embarrass them.